For as many decades as I remember, Private Eye has been a fortnightly feature of my life. It used to bring me joy, amusement and inspiration. Now, it mainly leaves me non-plussed at best and fuming with anger at worst. I don’t mind being upset by other views and expect, occasionally, to be annoyed by the content of The Eye. But lately it has lost all semblance of balance and I have cancelled my subscription.
This once great organ which was at the forefront of satirical journalism now seems edentulous and barely a shadow of its former self. I have no doubt the editor Ian Hislop has the occasional legal skirmish but long gone are the days of the prolonged court cases, many of which The Eye lost and consequently suffered financially. But when was it last in the headlines and can you name the last scalp it claimed simply by telling the truth? Admittedly, and not alone, they did sterling work over the disgraceful treatment of the sub-postmasters accused of financial irregularities, recently exonerated and some of whom committed suicide. But my reading of Private Eye has regressed over the years. As a lad I used to look at the cartoons, and little else. Then some ‘juicy’ stories—usually of a sexual nature—caught my adolescent eye. Later I began to read and appreciate the columns and, from time to time, I read the major features, especially the investigative pieces by the late Paul Foot. Lately, I mainly just look at the cartoons.
When I do delve deeper, I see a completely unbalanced and ostensibly left-wing bias. Tory MPs are pilloried (mostly deservedly) while Labour MPs are barely touched. The pro-Remain stance over Brexit was palpable; and continues. Moreover, this is further emphasised by the Hislop-Merton monopolised Have I Got New For You on The Ministry of Truth’s prime channel BBC1. The pandemic has been fertile ground for The Eye with the pseudonymous medical columnist ‘MD’ (aka Phil Hammond)—previously fairly insignificant and rarely interesting—promoted to a full page and a third to express his jaundiced views about the UK government’s handling of the pandemic. I am no fan of the present government or of the way they have managed the pandemic, but MD seems to run with the foxes and hunt with the hounds. One section will appear to give a reasonable view of the real threat of the virus; the next will play it up. MD seems to want to express a view about the virus, one with which I often agree, but then express the opposite if it provides an opportunity to criticise the government. For example, the column for 30 April played up the way the population has had the ‘shit scared out of them’, which many certainly have, but also played down the mental health consequences claiming that suicides have not increased This was published on the same day as it was reported that with inquests on hold, the cause of death in many probable suicides had not been confirmed and that this was probably driving down the figures. I invite MD to visit Hull where, within a 31-day span, six people took their final farewells from the Humber Bridge. The usual annual toll is around five. The cartoons have relentlessly promoted COVID-orthodoxy. But in the most recent issue, two people walking past what appears to be a prison, question whether the policies regarding care homes had not ‘taken things too far’. Does the editor see which way the wind is blowing, towards a significant backlash against lockdown?
Whilst not exactly relentless, The Eye never misses an opportunity to take a swipe at the following: Julia Hartley-Brewer; Peter Hitchens (that ‘little ray of sunshine’); Toby Young; and Johnny Mercer MP. Messrs Hartley-Brewer, Hitchens and Young have been heroes of the lockdown. Hitchens and Young from the outset and Hartley-Brewer, having seen the light after it became apparent that lockdowns were useless. The fact that Hitchens continues to contribute to The Oldie, the magazine established by Richard Ingrams founding editor of The Eye, suggest that things have changed radically since he relinquished the reins. As a former member of Her Majesty’s Armed Forces and war veteran, I applaud the work of Johnny Mercer whom Hislop and Merton once had on the panel of Have I Got New For You simply, it seemed, to humiliate him. The plight of the aged and hounded veterans of The Troubles in Northern Ireland is a national disgrace. But The Eye preferred to mock him over his, admittedly failed, attempt to resign thwarted pre-emptively by Boris Johnson who dismissed him. Mercer also impressed me with his public apology, published in The Spectator, over joining in the opprobrium aimed, wrongly, at Sir Roger Scruton over a fabricated article in New Statesman.
I don’t suppose that cancelling my subscription caused the slightest ripple at Private Eye, in fact they often seem proud of their cancelled subscriptions and regularly publish letters from those who cancel. My decision was made when I began to be more irritated than informed, less amused and being made to feel I was one of a minority of lunatics who voted for Brexit, questioned the necessity for lockdown and possibly read The Daily Telegraph. I would like to think I would have cancelled my subscription if Private Eye had moved completely in my direction. But it didn’t. Either way, it’s farewell to The Eye.

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