Holy smoke Nicola!

Roger Watson

The insane spectacle referred to as The First Minister of Scotland, the diminutive and diabolical Nicola Sturgeon plans to increase the risk to lives of Scottish pupils at school. Not content with making their lives a masked misery and freezing them to death with open windows in winter she now wants to make it more likely than not that they will die of smoke inhalation or severe burns. The latest bout of insanity from the mad woman herself is the plan to go round Scottish School sawing a few feet off all the doors. What for? You guessed it…Covid! And just to remind you, Covid is a virus which barely affects children with no underlying conditions, few die with it and it is on the wane. They—Nicola and the health fascist brigade—just cannot let go. No sooner do they lift Covid restrictions than they unleash some other madness. And this madness will cost £300,000. I am glad that the Barnett Formula is not going to waste.

Has nobody in the Scottish ‘Government’ the cojones* to stand up to her and speak out against this insanity? Doors in public buildings have long had to meet stringent fire regulations. Fire doors need, amongst other things, to be ‘tight fitting’. As any schoolboy—but patently not every schoolgirl in Scotland—knows, fires are fuelled by oxygen, air is 20% oxygen, and you need to prevent air getting to a fire. Also, smoke is toxic and smoke from a raging fire is more than toxic, it scorches the lining of the lungs and can be fatal. Fire doors prevent oxygen getting to a fire, hold a fire back for a specified length of time and also keep smoke out of rooms where there is no fire. But Nicola knows better and all the protective aspects of fire doors in schools will be compromised in a few whines of a Black & Decker saw (other brands are available, probably from companies in which Nicola has shares). I have to credit my son with the joke that the fire alarms will long ago have been disabled in case they frighten the kids. But I reckon that they have probably already been disabled. What if, in the process of fleeing a towering inferno, the kids mixed in the corridors and put everyone at risk of catching Covid?

As well as being unable to let go of the pandemic mentality, we are going to be left for decades with reminders that there was one. The streets are still festooned with social distancing stickers two years after they were first put there. Public buildings have stickers on doors reminding people of the same which are very hard to remove (I know as I have tried). Hand-gel dispensers are everywhere, many with no hand gel in them. In my former place of work some were still there years after the last norovirus outbreak. Eventually the stickers will fade, and the dispensers will be unscrewed from the walls, but Scottish pupils and teachers will stare at their diminished doors and wonder ‘WTF?’. That is, if the local fire prevention team have not declared the buildings unsafe and closed the schools again. Moreover, when the madness really is over, schools will spend a damn sight more than £300,000 replacing their sawn off doors. Better increase the Barnett Formula Boris!

*as I was writing this, Word reminded me that ‘cojones’ may be offensive to some readers!

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